A stereotype is a preconceived, fixed notion, especially about a person or group of people.
Most of us are familiar with the ongoing danger of negative stereotyping. Over centuries, across nations and in communities, tribes and families, negative stereotyping casts people as unacceptable, disposable, evil and culpable by reason of race, economic standing, nationality, religion, age, gender, etc. The result is dangerous and deadly.
Overlooked but just as dangerous is positive stereotyping. Positive stereotyping presumes that by reason of looks, race, professional expertise, financial success or standing in society, someone is good, sacred, respectable, trustworthy and above the law. The result is also dangerous and deadly.
You might remember the reports of close to 265 female gymnasts repeatedly molested by Dr. Lawrence G. Nassar the “respected” team doctor. In his case, as in the case of other predators in scandals that have shocked and horrified us, the predator plays on the positive stereotyping. He hides behind the posture of the good doctor, favorite coach, beloved priest, famous producer or respected politician, etc. Sadly, his pathological denial of doing anything wrong dovetails with our need to confirm our positive stereotypes.
Abuse is Hard to Believe
Why does nothing happen to prevent abuse, harm, violations, and lies that hurt so many.
The reasons are confounding and certainly include those surrounding the abuser who deny, cover-up and become complicit in atrocity for personal protection or gain.
In addition, many others unwittingly add to the nightmare by pushing back with the question, “How Could this be?” The question is understandable. The reality that we have a difficult time believing the truth because of preconceived positive bias is worth considering.
When Rachel Denhollander, one of the gymnasts assaulted by Dr. Nassar, became an attorney and filed the first police complaint against him in 2016 with documentation of her abuse in 2004 by a nurse practitioner and medical journals disputing Dr. Nassar’s abusive techniques, she reports losing her church, her friends and her privacy to a culture not willing to listen.
Why Won’t People Listen?
According to social psychologist, Leon Festinger, we strive for internal psychological consistency in our beliefs. When we are holding two beliefs that are in conflict, we experience “cognitive dissonance” which creates psychological stress.
“ How can a known and respected person be malevolent – a liar, an abuser?”
- To reduce the dissonance we often block facts that threaten our beliefs and double down on what we hold to be true.
- Psychologists consider “this doubling down in the face of conflicting evidence” as part of a set of behaviors known as “motivated reasoning.” Motivated reasoning is how we remain convinced of what we want to believe. Motivated reasoning drives us to ignore, avoid, reject or argue against information that confronts our beliefs.
- At this time the political and personal need of many to negate the serious spread of a lethal pandemic is a dangerous invitation to ignore what health experts are saying about steps toward prevention and saving lives.
Given the abuse perpetrated by famous directors, beloved coaches, trusted priests and elected politicians, etc., it may be time to tolerate the cognitive dissonance and loosen our positive and negative stereotypes. Stereotypes are a threat to truth. They don’t allow us to see people without bias. As such, they leave too many adults and children in harms way.
When people wonder why victims are so upset 15 or 20 years after abuse, it is because with validation comes the terrifying realization that the stereotypical “ good guy” was really “ the bad guy” who violated body, mind and spirit. The visceral awareness of the dangerous place they were in and the malice of the person they believed – is terrifying. Coming forward to bear witness, to join with others, to prevent it from happening to others – is not easy but healing.
The voices of victims, including those dying from COVID-19, are expressions that counter our stereotypes. They invite us to dare to listen for the truth.
We are trying to listen. We are starting to act. Listening and acting invite changes. We can’t stop now.
Here are some Podcasts from my Show Psych up Live – Hope you find them helpful -Suzanne
Listen in to Dr. Sheri Bauman discuss “Digital Aggression: Understanding Your Online Exposure”